Five Glorious Hours

 

It sure doesn't seem like it's been three months since I was frantically forming my Summer Survival Plan. But here we are nearing the end of August, and the kids and I have managed to survive.

Even though neither of my kids are officially going to real school this fall, this is still a very exciting school year for me. This will be Chase's first year of preschool. This means that for five glorious hours every week for the next nine months, I will be child-free!

I love my kids, but I can barely contain my excitement for those five glorious hours. I am overwhelmed by the possibilities of what I will be able to do... I can read a magazine. I can finish a cup of hot coffee. I can make a trip to the grocery store and actually remember to get what is on my list because I won't have the distraction of a 2-year-old pulling down every item from the shelves (and I'll make it home without any extra items that may end up in the cart from said 2-year-old). I can blog. I can clean the house (though the probability of this one actually happening is not very good). The possibilities are endless.

As much as I love summer, I am anxiously awaiting the start of the school year and those five glorious hours of me time. Here's how I can tell that the first day of school is just around the corner:

1. The amount of TV my kids watch is directly related to how many days are left until school starts. The closer school gets, the more TV they watch. After being with them all day almost every day this summer, it has become all too easy to just say, "sure, you can watch one more show." I just can't help myself. It's like an addiction.

2. That neighborhood kid (you know the one) is basically living at my house (and every other house in the neighborhood except his own) now. He is just as ready for school to start as I am, and he has become like an extra child to all the neighborhood families because he is bored at his own house.

3. I am suddenly finding myself fearing all the crazy new pig viruses and flus that are out there now. It's just a matter of time until my kids will be spending more and more time indoors, trading these germs with all their friends.

4. I keep catching myself turning my head the other way when I see one of the kids do something they shouldn't do, just so I don't have to yell at them yet again.

5. I have football fever. And Bachelor fever. And Grey's fever. There aren't many TV shows that I watch on a regular basis, but I still have a few guilty pleasures. I'm definitely ready for some good Steelers games and the start of my Fantasy Football league (let's go Team Yinz Double YOIs!). I am anxiously awaiting the announcement of who the next Bachelor will be. And I can't wait to see which of Seattle Grace's best surgeons will make it out of the woods alive.

Which ones will make it? The Grey's Anatomy season premiere is September 27!

6. Any attempt to make a last-minute back-to-school purchase is a failure because all the book bags, pencils and notebooks have been replaced with Christmas decorations.

7. I am desperately trying to cram in all those things I planned to do over the summer. One more playdate, one more day at the pool, one more bottle of wine on the deck with Chad after the kids have gone to sleep...

Are you ready for the school year to start? What signs do you see that summer is coming to an end?

Forcing a Bird to Fly

Summer is about half over now. Translation: there has been no school for over two months. On one hand, I can't believe we're already nearing the end of July. On the other hand, the boys and I are starting to be around each other just a little bit too much. With my summer survival plan in full effect, we've made it this far...but we still have a long way to go.

We've been keeping busy with things like swimming, making chocolate covered bananas, picking blueberries, visiting the many playgrounds in our area and vacationing in Florida. And I've spent plenty of time playing with my boys at home too... We play "Go Fish" and hide-and-seek; we build Lego trees that cats get stuck in and need to be rescued by the fire department; we have dance parties and animal birthday parties; I make alphabet scavenger hunts out of sidewalk chalk.

Chase enjoyed the chocolate covered bananas that we made

Alec loved the alphabet scavenger hunt

So it's not like we've just been sitting around the house all summer. But the times when we are sitting around have started to turn into a nightmare. The boys start jumping on me and fighting with each other; I start yelling at them to get off of me or to stop fighting; and after all the jumping, fighting and yelling, I'm too exhausted to actually play with them, so they get bored and start jumping on me and fighting again. This happens over and over again, and no one really has any fun. Jump. Fight. Yell. Repeat.

So yesterday, after I had become the boys' personal trampoline for about the tenth time, I decided I had had enough. So I did something that I never thought to do before. I made them go play.

Yes, you read that correctly. I made my children play.

I gave them a choice. They could go to the playroom in the basement to play, or they could go upstairs to their rooms to play. I didn't care where they went, but they had to go somewhere and find something to do that didn't involve injuring each other (or me).

It was like a lightbulb went on for me. Ok, so maybe it was more like a gigantic chandelier with a blinking, neon "ON" switch right in front of my eyes. I mean here are two kids, in a house full of toys. Kids love to play, so why had I never thought to do this before?

But the reaction I got was one that I would have expected if I told them they couldn't have a bedtime snack. They whined; they complained; one of them even started crying. Are you kidding me? What kind of kid doesn't want to play?

I even made sure to reinforce that they were not in trouble and that they just needed to find something to do other than clobber each other. They still weren't thrilled about the idea, but finally Chase reluctantly retreated to the basement and Alec stomped up to his room. They had about as much enthusiasm about going to play as I have when it's cleaning day. Well at least they weren't demonstrating their WWF abilities on each other anymore.

I was just looking for a 10 minute break from the fighting, but what came next was nothing short of a miracle. Once they boys got over their whining and pouting, they actually started playing. They played. And played. And played. And played. They played together, and they played on their own. And they just kept playing like it was the first time they had ever seen their toys. The two boys who just moments earlier couldn't go more than two minutes without picking on each other were now playing better than I had ever seen them play. And all I had to do was force them to play.

Somehow, forcing a child to play just doesn't seem to make sense. I don't have to force my kids to eat vegetables. I don't have to force them to drink milk. I don't have to force them to brush their teeth. Usually. But for some reason I have to force them to play. Seriously? That's like forcing a ball to bounce... Or forcing a dog to fetch a toy... Or forcing a mom to take a night off to go see Magic Mike. But I digress...

I think you get my point. Playing should come naturally to children. They should want to play. They shouldn't need to be forced to play.

But maybe it's more like forcing a baby bird to leave the nest. Birds are meant to fly, but until the mama bird forces the baby to try it, they baby won't leave the nest. Once the baby realizes it can fly, it opens up a whole new world.

Well, I have forced my baby birds to fly. And they have discovered a whole new world. Sure they've played with their toys before. But it took a little pushing for them to discover this new world and really want to play on their own.

Now that they have discovered this world, I'm hoping they will continue to explore it. I'm sure there will still be plenty more jumping, and fighting, and yelling. But when that starts to happen there will be more forced playing...or should I say forced flying.

A Week in Florida with no Leapster

We just got back from a week of family vacation in Florida. This was our first relatively long vacation as a family, and if I'm being honest I was a little bit scared. Ok, if I'm being totally honest I was terrified.

I wasn't scared of flying or of encountering Jaws in the ocean. I was scared that we would be driving each other crazy stuck in a small space that was hundreds of miles away from our home.

My executive decision to leave Alec's Leapster home did not help with my fear. At home I let him play with his Leapster a bit every day if he wants to, but this week I wanted him to experience our vacation without his nose glued to a 3-inch screen. So I was completely anticipating a melt down when he realized it was back home...but I'll get to that later.

Believe it or not, our vacation was actually somewhat relaxing, despite Tropical Storm Debby arriving at the end of our trip. The boys loved being in a different place. They loved the ocean and sand. They really loved the kid's museum that we found on a rainy day. They just loved the adventure all around.

Our view pre-Debby

The same view after Debby arrived

As with other trips I've taken, I used this vacation as an opportunity to reflect on my life and learn about myself. When Chad and I were in New York City last year, I was reminded of my stay-at-home mom wardrobe and my blessing of having wonderful family in my life, among other things (see What New York Taught Me About Being a Parent). Here is what our trip to Florida reinforced to me:

My kids are awesome. 

I mean, I knew that -- but sometimes I forget how awesome they really are. One example of how they were so awesome on this particular vacation was the way they handled a 17-hour return trip that was only supposed to take seven hours. I'll save the details for a possible future blog on my new opinions of United Airlines and why I will never fly them again.

Let's just say that my boys handled a 10-hour airport imprisonment like champs. In fact, they handled it better than Chad and I did.

While Chad and I stomped around muttering angry statements under our breath, Alec and Chase ran around squealing with delight at our airport adventure. Sure they got bored and were tired (after all, they were up at 6:15am, and we didn't get back to our house until 11:30pm). But they had fun exploring the airport, going up and down escalators, jumping over lines on the floor and spending quality time with Mom, Dad and Grandma. I'm sure they now know Dulles airport better than most of the employees there know it.  

I'm getting older. 

Ok, I also knew this one. But one particular experience in Florida made sure to remind me of this fact. We had passed a fun-looking place called the Daiquiri Shak a few times, so one evening Chad's mom stayed back at the condo after the boys were asleep so that Chad and I could try it out. When we arrived, we saw that there was a rather large crowd and a band playing. Neither of these bothered us, so we found a seat at one of the few remaining empty tables.

After we were settled and had ordered our daiquiris, we took a better look at the crowd and realized that there was a birthday party going on. Without judging (too much), I will guess that the members of the birthday party were in about their low to mid 20s and liked to party. Chad and I were quickly surrounded by dozens of people wearing neon pink hats with their names on them, guzzling beers with neon straws. The names on the hats ranged anywhere from Aimee to Smash and Big Taco.

Once I was able to tear my attention away from Big Taco, I started to pay closer attention to the band, which was way louder than it needed to be. Despite the volume of the band, their song selection wasn't bad. But their performance was terrible. They went from playing an incredibly out of tune version of "Kryptonite" to an even worse version of "Play that Funky Music."

When the band finally stopped playing long enough for Chad and me to hear each other talk, we both agreed that this was not our cup of tea. So when our daiquiris came, we chugged them faster than Big Taco could probably chug a beer, paid our tab and headed straight back to our condo. It wasn't even 9:00pm yet, but all I could think about was getting back to the couch and curling up with the latest Janet Evanovich book that I was in the middle of reading.

At some point in my life I could have been one of the people sporting a neon hat and partying to a bad band. But this defining moment made me realize that I have definitely moved on to an "older" phase in my life.

I have incredible family.

Hey, just because New York reminded me of this doesn't mean Florida can't remind me as well. Chad's mom came along with us on our trip, and I'm pretty sure I would have been a stressed out mess if she weren't there. The boys adore her, and she's pretty fond of them as well, so she spent a good amount of time playing with the boys and keeping them entertained. If Chase was napping, Alec would have "special Grandma time" that he looked forward to every day. And Chad and I even got to go out to two dinners by ourselves (not including the Daiquiri Shak!) while she stayed back and had pizza or Chinese food with the boys.

Headed out to dinner without the kids

Children are always learning.

One of the reasons that I think my boys did so well on this trip was because it was a learning experience for them. To them it wasn't about tropical storms or delayed airplanes or men in pink hats that say Big Taco. It was about learning. Learning what sand feels like. Learning first hand where dolphins live. Learning how to turn the reading lights in an airplane on (and off, and on, and off, and on...). Learning that there are other places in the world that have museums for kids that are just as good (and in this case way better) than the ones that we have at home.

Sure they'll learn most of these things in school, but learning it first hand makes it so much more exciting. There's something about experiencing things in person that just can't be expressed in a text book or even movie.

Honestly, this is the main reason I didn't want Alec to bring his Leapster. Sure it may have made the 10-hour delay a little bit easier. And it would have been a quick solution to the (very few) times when he got bored on the trip. But he survived without it and learned so much more in this week than he will probably ever learn with his Leapster, despite some of the fairly educational games that come along with it.

Alec learning about stingrays at the Florida Aquarium

Chase learning about seashells on the beach

I am so glad that my boys embraced traveling as well as they did. I love to travel, and it gives me hope that we will be able to have many more successful adventures together as a family. Hopefully exposing them to these opportunities as they grow up will show them that there is a whole other world out there with so much to see. And if it doesn't, at least I know I've done what I can.

Oh, and the Leapster? Alec didn't even ask about it once the whole week.

My Summer Survival Plan

Wasn't it just September? I could have sworn that I just went on my four-store half-day quest with Alec for his Toy Story backpack for 3-year-old preschool last week. But somehow we've managed to fly through nine months of preschool, and now the boys and I have three months of driving each other crazy quality time together.

Alec on his first day of 3-year-old preschool

Alec just finished his second year of preschool, and at his end-of-year party I had to fight to keep the tears back. I didn't want to cry because I was sad that my little boy is growing up so fast. I wanted to cry because for the next three months I don't have three mornings a week where someone else is keeping one of my boys entertained.

Alec on his last day of preschool

I am definitely not one of those moms who is creative or good at coming up with things to do. My idea of creativity is opening up the kitchen drawer with the big utensils and telling the boys to go to town.

Instead, I am one of the moms who hears about something really cool that another mom did and thinks, I wish I had thought of that. Then I proceed to "borrow" the idea. Hey, my boys will never know the difference. And besides, isn't that basically the whole idea behind Pinterest?

So with Alec used to doing really creative crafts, fun activities and playing with 15 other kids for three mornings each week, I have a feeling the transition into summer may be a bit challenging. I mean, a drawer full of big spoons is great, but it only provides entertainment for so long.

In order to help with this transition, I've really been trying to get Alec excited about the fun things we can do over the summer. So the other day when he told me he was excited for summer, I breathed a sigh of relief. I asked him what he was most excited about, and do you know what his answer was? Our upcoming beach vacation? Nope. Swimming in the pool? Nope. Amusement parks? Nope. Are you ready for this? Corn on the cob. Yep, that is what my 4-year-old is most excited about for the next three months. The sigh of relief that I had breathed moments before was quickly replaced with panic. I realized that I needed to come up with a plan.

My plan to survive the summer is a basic one. If it's a nice day, we will be at the township pool trying not to drown each other. If it's not a nice day, we will be trapped inside at home trying not to strangle each other. And regardless of the weather, assuming we have all managed not to drown or strangle each other, I will end each day with a celebratory bottle glass of wine once the kids are sleeping. It's that simple.

With my new plan in place, I'm starting to feel a little bit better about the next few months. I'm sure once we get into the swing of things, I'll have no problem keeping the boys entertained. With the pool, beach, amusement parks and play dates, I'm sure we'll have no problem surviving the next three months. And besides, if we are having a trying day there's always Pinterest and corn on the cob.

I guess it has always been one of Alec's favorite foods...